Book Release ~ Coming Soon!

INTRODUCTION

The Poetry of Addiction was conceived on the very first day as a teenager, I believed the enemy’s lie that alcohol and drugs could be trusted. It was born in fiery revelation 30 years later, behind the bars of a Texas prison, by the power of the Holy Spirit after God reached into my fallen life and delivered me out of the captivity, darkness, and hell of addiction and into the loving arms of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In a raging battle with alcoholism and drug addiction for more than two-thirds of my life, at age 46, I had fallen so fast and so deep into addicted darkness that up until that time, I had never experienced before. As a man who had just completed my first time in prison and was beginning a new life in my home state of Texas, I thought the days of my disappearing into the very dangerous and unpredictable world of crack cocaine and methamphetamine addiction were behind me. Boy, was I wrong!

Addiction had invaded my life and ruled over me for many years, causing a roller coaster ride of instability, chaos, and destruction. My life of addiction had been a perilous expedition into the harshness of this cruel and unforgiving world. A dangerous journey inward, deep within myself, that finally led me to become the Man of God I am today. When I look back over the years, I see a landscape marked by high mountains of achievement, filled with accomplishment and accolades, and dark, low-lying valleys of collapse, marked by loneliness and despair. I can observe myself traversing indiscriminately through a life characterized by periods of monumental success, always met by tragic failure, only to scratch and claw my way back and somehow find some sort of prosperity again. Once I reached this new plateau, like clockwork in due time, I would plummet again into another failure, which always led me to the hostile emotional land of guilt, shame, disappointment, and hopelessness.

This book is an in-depth look into how addiction was introduced into my life and how it seeded itself in my soul early on. As an unsuspecting, naïve, and unprepared teenager experimenting with alcohol and drugs, I believed the lie that these friends could be counted on and trusted to provide harmless fun and excitement. I believe they could be the source of never-ending good times with no negative side effects or ill consequences. Let the good times roll and the party never stop! And that was the bait, and addiction was the trap!

Growing up in the late 1970s and 1980s in Dallas, Texas, I was the only son in a family that was well-educated, successful in business, and went to church on Sundays. I was also a very talented athlete, which catapulted me into becoming a well-known and successful high school and collegiate football player, with many honors and accolades. Addiction erupted in my life in 1991, the year I was cut from the Edmonton Eskimos Football Team in the Canadian Football League. Resembling a dormant volcano suddenly blowing its top like Mount St. Helens did in 1980, I was propelled headfirst into the crack cocaine epidemic that raged in our country’s inner cities and ghettos. For a young man who grew up with wealth, fame, and a quality education, this experience was a far cry from the beautiful university campus and the wealthy suburban neighborhoods where I once lived and played. This book is a deep dive into the profound journey of my tragic descent into the wickedness of addiction. It is a commentary describing and detailing the unbelievable destruction this wicked weapon of annihilation caused in every area and relationship in my life. Addiction, with its razor-sharp stinging hooks, wrapped itself around me and planted itself deep into my flesh and soul and refused to let go. I was hooked. I was trapped. Unknowingly, I was headed straight to hell! Read about my journey into the darkness and the shadow of death, and my final encounter with the devil himself when he asked me for my soul!

While taking on a life of its own, addiction led me into a vast emotional wilderness of agonizing pain, misery, disgust, defeat, anguish, and disappointment, marking my soul with several illuminating spiritual awakenings and revelations that I will detail throughout this book. The deeper I traveled into this maze of insanity and the longer I trekked the dark and lonely road headed for destruction, the more I began to realize that I was caught in the crossfire amid a battle that was being fought for my very soul. The incomprehensible amount of suffering associated with the level of addiction that manifested itself within me became the very fuel that would inevitably deliver me back to my God. The absolute lie of addiction and the spiritual disease that accompanies it became the enemy’s weapon of choice for his attack against me to destroy my soul and to somehow trick and deceive me into following him into the pits of hell reserved for him and the fallen angels who had rebelled against God. The enemy used addiction to propel me into my rebellion against my Creator. It was the enemy of my soul’s plan to separate me and keep me detached from the Light, Love, and Truth of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, who instead became my saving Grace and Rescuer. Through His Awesome Power and unending Love, Jesus faithfully and ultimately lifted me out of the lies and deceptions that formed the dark, flaming pit of addiction, and delivered me into the fullness of His Spirit of Truth.

The Poetry of Addiction is my witness and testimony to all that when Jesus sets you free, you are free indeed. I know this as my truth, when an addict surrenders all to the Lord, then and only then can the addict, through the Power of the Holy Spirit and by the Authority in the Name of Jesus Christ, finally step into Victory over all addictions, just as Jesus Christ has claimed Victory over all things. Once I surrendered and chose Jesus Christ and life, I entered into a two-way intimate love relationship with Him and found rest for my weary battle-torn soul. Once I made Jesus Christ the Lord and Savior of my life, that decision enforced His Victory over my addiction. In Jesus Christ, I have finally found my integrity through my now, Holy Spirit-guided life of action and obedience to God’s Word. The Lord has carried me out of the failure of defeat and into the success of Victory, something I have only ever found in Him. I am successful when I quit trying to be my own god and savior, following the world’s broken belief systems, and submitting myself in full surrender of my will to the will of my Creator, Jesus Christ. As I submit myself and my will to the Lord of my life, He guides me into His understanding and His wisdom of the person He created me to be. In this, He unveils to me His purpose for my life. As He reveals His Truth to me, as long as I stay submitted to His will, I am open to becoming that person, a new creation, a disciple, and a witness of Jesus Christ. As God perfects His good work in me and begins the process of transforming me into the image of His son, I can understand God’s purpose for my life. Once I understand my purpose, then I can begin to live out that purpose, cooperating with God in His plan. Then my life begins to make sense, and the struggle within myself disappears, and I find peace!

2 CORINTHIANS 5:17 (NKJV) Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.

In Jesus Christ, all old things have passed away, including my addiction and the wreckage of my past. Now, all things are new, and I can rest in the assurance that Jesus can do better for me than I can ever do for myself alone. I get out of my own way and let God have His way in me. As I do this, God creates in me a new life guided by His gentle, loving yet firm hand as He leads me into all Truth. My hope is for full healing in all my current relationships, which are truly precious to me, and for understanding, forgiveness, and restoration in the relationships that were destroyed in my past. I am humble, contrite, remorseful, and apologetic for all the hurt and pain that I caused to others in my addiction and for the damage that it has done to the people I have loved the most. I take advantage of every opportunity that God provides for me to make amends to those people. My new way of life and my walk in the Spirit will serve as a witness and testimony to everyone about the Truth in Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior, and that through Him all things are possible, including Victory over addiction. The most important thing in my life, rising from the ashes of a cold addicted death, is my relationship with Jesus Christ and my life’s mission to share His Love, Hope, and Strength with others so they too can come out from the land of the lost, the land of the living dead, and join me in the Triumph of Jesus Christ over addiction.

Please enjoy the story of my life and God’s poetry given to me in fiery revelation from behind the bars of a cold and lonely, depressing prison in Austin, Texas, USA. In my incarceration, I finally surrendered to Jesus Christ, listened to God’s voice, and acted on His life-giving instructions, which led me happily into true Freedom. In Jesus Christ, I have broken free from the heavy yoke and stifling bondage of self. I have claimed Victory in Jesus Christ over the addiction that nearly destroyed my soul. I have come out of a world gone insane and delivered from my stubborn, rebellious, and sinful fleshly nature, which, up until now, held me captive and imprisoned in darkness for most of my life. I have now settled into the rest and peace of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. The Prince of Peace walked me into freedom, in the most unlikely place on this planet to experience liberty. I found sweet freedom as a five-time convicted felon, locked in a sad and lonely prison, behind razor wire fences, steel doors, and rough concrete block walls. It was in this prison that I was able to finally break through the biggest lie of my life, which was the enemy’s weapon of addiction in a war that was being waged for the destination of my soul between the forces of good and evil. Because of my surrender to Jesus Christ, I have been delivered back to my God, out of a horrible, drug-addicted pit by His saving Grace and Mercy, incomprehensible, unfailing Love, and the awesome Power and Truth that can only be found in a relationship with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

I hope that you, who read this book, will allow Jesus Christ to come into your heart through the story of my life, the poetry of my soul, and the scripture written in this book. I pray that the Holy Spirit reveals to you in your spirit, the flaming truth about addiction and who Jesus Christ is as our Lord and Savior, the only begotten son of our Father, Almighty God! Whether you are addicted or not, or if you are just an interested reader, this book is my heart’s deepest expression to you, describing in brutal honesty, my lifelong battle with addiction and my final deliverance from it into the truth. Today, in absolute authority, standing firmly and boldly over addiction, with my foot pressed squarely on its neck, I proclaim fearlessly the triumphant war cry of Victory given to me by the Power of the Blood and the Authority in the Name of Jesus Christ.

We all have to make our own personal journey through the trials and tribulations of this fallen, dark, and deceptive world. In this journey, we are challenged to find our way out of the grips of black death and into the Light of Eternal Life with our Creator. My journey led me through some of the most dangerous, spiritually wicked wilderness and wasteland of the living dead, which snaked its way through the dark valleys of alcohol, crack cocaine, and methamphetamine addiction and ended in a devastating pit of absolute defeat, despair, and an encounter with the devil. Your journey may be the same, similar, or entirely different. Wherever your journey takes you, I wish you Godspeed, and I hope the story of my life contained in the pages of this book will give you inspiration and encouragement to never give up. It took me over 25 years to finally overcome my flesh, the devil, addiction, and my bondage to sin. No matter how many times you get knocked down, you must get back up, keep on fighting, and cry out to Jesus for help. Remember, the Victory in your life and over addiction and sin only comes when you completely surrender yourself to the loving care of Jesus Christ. Giving my life in surrender to Jesus Christ, took the never-ending, never successful, always defeating battle out of my own hands that were never strong enough to stand the test of time, and placed the fight where it belongs, in the mighty hands of all Power, unending Strength, absolute Authority and the complete Dominion of Jesus Christ, who has Victory over all things. Our Victory has already happened, and Jesus is waiting for us to enforce it by accepting Him. I finally had to come to the end of myself and my strength, and step into Christ’s Victory, enforcing and inserting that Victory into my life. This was only accomplished once I gave my whole self over to Him; the good, the bad, and the ugly. In my absolute brokenness and destruction, I was able to surrender fully to Him, and once I did, immediately, I entered into His Victory and found much-needed rest for my tormented, wearied, downtrodden, and battle-torn soul. As I entered into a Full White-Flag Surrenderof myself to Jesus, I entered into Truth and the fullness of His unconditional love. Not by my own strength and might, which is limited; and not by my own understanding, which is ill-equipped to handle such devastating confusion; only by the Power, Wisdom, and Grace of the Most-High God, the Creator of all things, was I able to finally overcomemy addiction.

1 JOHN 5:4-5 (NKJV) For whatever is born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world – our faith. Who is he who overcomes the world, but he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?

Read this book and if you can relate to any one part of it, then you too can live in victory over any addiction or difficulty that has you locked in bondage, keeping you from being your very best and living a life of freedom and prosperity. In my Victory, only found in Jesus Christ, the Lord gave me the mission and calling of my life, which is to preach to all who will listen, the good news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the unveiling of the lie of addiction, so others too can be made free.

The Lord has led me out of addiction and prison and into a ministry and calling that has led me back into the prisons where I live and also into the prisons and drug-infested communities in Liberia, West Africa, and being able to help the drug-addicted population there. In Monrovia, the capital city of Liberia, drug-addicted men, women, and young people have taken over the Palm Grove Cemeteryand the Center Street Ghetto at its edge. There are hundreds of tombs in this cemetery, almost 13 acres of them. Fourteen years of death-by-machete civil war left no shortage of bodies to bury in Liberia. Some of the older drug addicts are former child soldiers and victims of abuse from this bloody and brutal war, who became addicted to drugs and had nowhere to go when the war was over. The warlords kidnapped the young boys and often killed their family members in front of them before making them go off to war. To get the frightened children to fight, the warlords gave them drugs to make them brave, and they became addicted. They gave them Marijuana, Crack Cocaine, and Black Tar Heroin, and fed them a mixture of Alcohol, Cane Juice, and Gunpowder that got them high and supposedly made them unafraid. The warlords even made the children cannibalize their victims. Once the disarmament came, the government took away the guns and machetes, but the addiction and trauma stayed. The brutal civil warsseeded drug addiction in Liberia!

Today, there is an entire population that consists of several generations and people of all ages, addicted to drugs and living in the cemeteries and ghettos across the country in the most horrible conditions imaginable. Babies are being born into this environment that never has a chance at a decent life, and the infant mortality rate is high. This devastated people group is named Zogos. They have been forgotten by the rest of their society and persecuted, even unto death. There are very few resources to help the Zogos. These hurt, broken, lost, and addicted people need our help. Praise the Lord! God has given me this ministry, a burden, and a massive mission to help the Drug Addicted, Poor, Homeless, and Disadvantaged People of Liberia! We are here to show them that Jesus has not forgotten them, and neither have we. Currently, I have established a non-profit 501 (c) (3) Organization here in the United States named Sons and Daughters of Thunder Ministries and a Liberian Not-for-Profit NGO named Liberation Center Liberia to help facilitate this call upon my life. What Jesus did in me, He will do in those that He is sending me to serve as a witness of His unending Grace, Mercy, and Love!

ZECHARIAH 4:6 (NKJV) ‘Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,’ says the Lord of hosts.

The same Spirit that hovered over the face of the waters in creation and the same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead is the same Spirit that lives in me and anoints me for this mission and calling upon my life to help God transform the lives of the habitually incarcerated and drug addicted. It is this same Spirit that all those who make the decision to surrender their lives to Jesus Christ are filled with when they are born-again and become the righteousness of God, who overcome their addictions and sin and become new creations in Jesus Christ, just as I have become. I am an example for them of what is possible with God. My life is a testimony of His goodness!

“May God bless you when reading this book and give you a new revelation and understanding of your Victory over all things that can only be found in Jesus Christ.” ~ Michael Bowen